From Nowhere
by RabbitHole26
Summary: But it was in that moment that it hit Emily, that wow, Hanna was really beautiful.


"I already love this school!" Hanna yells before taking what was probably her sixth or seventh shot of the evening. Emily laughs and clinks their glasses together before throwing her shot back like a champ as well.

"Have I mentioned how happy I am we decided to go to the same school?" Emily says, clearly as drunk as a Hanna, but still functioning pretty well.

"And to think, we didn't even plan it," Hanna replies with a smirk.

And they really hadn't. Once Emily had realized she wouldn't be able to keep swimming, at least not at the competitive level, she had decided to go to whichever school offered her the largest scholarship for her grades. When she finally announced the news that she would be attending the State University of New York, Hanna had excitedly explained that she was also going there, based on the fact that her grandparents lived near by and it was far away from Rosewood.

"Seriously though, I've never been happier. There is no more A. We can be normal people now. We can go to parties, drink, and experience college without having to look over our shoulder every single second of every day," Hanna rambles, taking a swig from the red cup she is now holding. Two guys, who looked like they were probably in the most preppy frat on campus, approach the blonde girl and start talking to her. Even though they were blatantly hitting on her, Hanna didn't seem to be interested, but that didn't stop her from introducing them to Emily.

"This is my best friend in the entire world," she announces before leaning over and placing a sloppy kiss on the brunette's cheek.

Emily knows she's drunk, but in that moment everything changes.

She has always seen Hanna as just a friend, she's never even considered the possibility that she could be attracted to her, and she's never checked the blonde girl out even though she's had a million opportunities to. But it was in that moment that it hit Emily, that wow, Hanna was really beautiful. And Hanna was cute. And Hanna was the kind of girl you'd want your parents to meet. And Hanna was the kind of girl you'd want to take places, and buy things, and do anything for just to see her smile. And once that idea crosses Emily's mind, she can't go back. She can't _not _think of Hanna that way, she can't categorize her as a strictly platonic friend anymore.

...

Emily has no idea what to do. She hopes – _prays _– it's the alcohol but when she wakes up the next morning and sees Hanna sleeping adorably on the futon in her dorm room, she knows she's a goner.

They have breakfast together and while Hanna has been recapping the past night's events, Emily has barely said a word. It only takes about five minutes for Hanna to notice something is bothering her, and for the first time ever, Emily hates that the other girl knows her so well.

"Are you okay? Did something happen last night that I don't remember?" the blonde asks, clearly concerned.

"What? No, no I'm just tired," Emily replies, avoiding eye contact.

"Okay...well if something is bothering you, you know you can tell me," Hanna says, looking a little hurt that Emily is so blatantly lying to her.

"I know. Seriously I'm just tired. And nervous for the first day of classes," the brunette responds, trying to lighten the mood. Hanna just nods and lets it go, and Emily is grateful for that.

After they finish eating, Hanna decides to head back to her own dorm to shower and get organized for Monday, and she gives Emily a huge hug before she walks off.

"Love you, Em. Call me to get dinner later!" she calls over her shoulder.

...

Emily doesn't call her though, and after she's done with her classes on Monday she realizes she still hasn't talked to her best friend once. Hanna texts her later and asks how her first day went, and even though Emily knows that ignoring her won't solve anything, she responds only with one word answers for the rest of the week and eventually Hanna stops trying to make conversation. Before she knows it, it's already the weekend again and she hasn't seen the blonde girl in 6 days, which is a lot for them, considering Emily can't remember the last time they went this long without seeing each other. Although it's been killing Emily deep down, she's made some new friends and actually has been enjoying the college life.

Since it's a Saturday night, she heads to the "freshman bar" (aka the only bar that hardly ever ID's) with a couple of the girls from one of her classes. Emily is only on her second beer when she spots Hanna in the crowd. The girl is doing shots in the corner with a pack of girls who look like they came straight from the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, so Emily can already assume they are in some type of sorority. There's a bunch of guys with them too and she can tell that Hanna is shamelessly flirting with the one seated next to her. Emily's mood instantly changes. She hates that she's jealous, she hates that she wants to punch this poor guy in the face, but not as much as she hates the fact that she hasn't talked to Hanna in a week. Then the blonde looks over towards the bar and catches her eye and Emily doesn't know what to do. She tells her friends she's going outside for a minute to get some air before pushing her way through the crowd and out the back door. There are two guys sitting on the curb smoking several feet away, but other than that it's quiet out back. Peaceful.

Until a very drunk Hanna Marin comes barreling out the door and stumbles towards Emily.

"Emily Fields what the _fuck _is your problem?" the blonde slurs, shoving the other girl, hard.

"Jesus, Hanna. Nothing. There's no problem"

"Oh really? So you've just been blatantly ignoring me for fun?"

"I'm not ignoring you."

"That's bullshit Emily. I know you, remember, I _know_ you."

"I've just been busy."

The anger melts off Hanna's face and is replaced by a look of sadness as she's silent for a moment before speaking again, "Look, I get it. We're in college and you want to branch out. You want to go meet new people, and make new friends, and date hot lesbians and you don't want your high school bestie dragging you down or keeping you stuck in the past. That's fine Em, but tell me that, don't just kick me to the curb with no explanation so easily."

"It's not like that..." the brunette tries.

"Then what is it like?"

Emily is silent, she just shakes her head. She doesn't know why she's being totally cold to the most important person in her life, but she figures this is much better than telling her the truth and reliving the exact same scenario she went through with Alison.

"Go to hell Emily," Hanna mumbles before walking off, not even bothering to go back inside the bar.

But the more Emily thinks about it, the more she can't ever see Hanna reacting the way Alison did. She can't see Hanna playing with her heart.


End file.
